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Discussions - On Other Matters - View Post - Archive
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Date
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7/17/2008 6:56:41 PM
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Posted By
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Nostradama |
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Subject
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There's a real difference . . . (long)
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in the way people are treated, because of their gender. It's already been said, but many women would be flattered to be taken for years younger than they really are. I laughed my head off the last time I was ID'd in a bar. The legal drinking age here at the time was 21, and I was 27.
Until I was well into my forties, I was buying a lot of my casual clothes in the kids' department. No sales tax if you're buying for a kid. So that was an advantage.
I've finally realized that no parents are perfect. It just doesn't happen. I had a real problem when I discovered by accident that I was adopted. It took an English government bureaucrat to give me the news via long-distance phone call to England, in the middle of the night. And I was 48 when that happened. What really bothered me was that my father, when he was dying, and knew that he was dying, didn't tell me, even 'tho he was certainly physically capable of doing it. He was a man who had raised me with some pretty high expectations. If I'd been in his situation, I would have been expected to talk about the adoption. And he didn't. It would have been regarded as disgraceful not to talk about it, by the standards he raised me with. So he failed in his own standards.
It took me a long time to deal with that fact. He would never have allowed me to do something like that. Now, after all these years, I can understand that he wasn't perfect as a parent. No one is. My mother certainly wasn't. My mother's attitude toward parenting was like a US Marine Corps drill sergeant. But it takes a long time, for some people, to accept that and live with it.
I have to say that if someone got confused and thought I was a man, I'd be pretty upset. Very upset, actually. I can certainly understand that. On the other hand, and I'm not joking, and I'm probably gonna get hammered for it, any guy I've known who could be mistaken for a woman has been drop-dead gorgeous.
Do you have the financial resources to see a stylist/wardrobe consultant/general appearance specialist, or a life-style consultant? A male friend of mine did that, and the difference in his appearance and the way he carried himself was phenomenal. In my opinion, it was the best money he ever spent. If that's not possible, maybe a few copies of GQ might help. Take a look at the clothes and the hairstyles. Again, depending upon your financial resources, that might give you some clothing tips, which you can follow either in a department store, a consignment store, or a thrift store.
Please remember that you have a family here that likes and respects you, Bob. I do. I care what happens in your life.
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