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Discussions - Nontraditional Sex - View Post - Archive
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Date
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8/2/2008 6:53:57 PM
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Posted By
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SheWhoMustNotBeNamed |
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Subject
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Re: Watching your partner with someone else
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>If you have enjoyed seeing it or been turned on by it, can you explain what you liked about it, or why it turned you on?
I think of my partners as being sexy and desirable. I like to see that affirmed by others. I like being able to have the perspective of an observer/voyeur, so that I can appreciate a partner in action in a way that is not possible when he is engaged directly with me.
At the very least, I like and respect my partners and I often have deeper feelings for them. By extension, I typically feel positively toward others that my partners care about and/or desire. I've noticed this vicarious compassion for the past and present girl friends of my current partners since my teens. So I also feel good about that person feeling good about my partner.
I also experience a mild to strong attraction to those that my partners are attracted to. This probably follows in part from a similar vicarious appreciation, as well as to an independent attraction to the individual on her own merits, depending on her own attributes.
Outside of any relational reason for my arousal at watching a partner with another, I like group sex and voyeurism because they are novel, taboo, and exciting. So I also have a generalized positive response to watching, as well.
Those experiences are always an adventure and they increase intimacy and the overall "energy" in a relationship. It's exciting and fun to share that with a partner, a partner in "crime" so to speak. :-)
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